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I've Decided to Be a Gold-Digger

Now, before you dismiss me and this post (lol), give me a second to explain.

In my most recent romantic (and work, yikes!) relationships, I've often found myself over-performing. If I am honest with myself, that over performance was because of a few reasons: (1) I recognize that I have dated out of a scarcity mindset (I'll talk more about that on another post) and (2) I've fallen in love with potential far more than reality.

Because I saw the potential in my past partners, I often fell in love with what I thought I saw in them rather than what they really were. What that made me do was to bring more to the table than I should have.

Listen, if someone is not willing to put in AT LEAST what you do, they do not deserve you!

I'm not only talking about just money. If someone is not at least meeting you EMOTIONALLY, PHYSICALLY, MENTALLY, FINANCIALLY, and SPIRITUALLY (how many times have you prayed over someone who hasn't thought of praying for you???), you're wasting your time. Take it from me.

If we continue to compensate for their lack, we never allow them to grow into someone capable of offering more. Even more than that, when we overcompensate, we are subconsciously telling ourselves that we don't deserve more.

So, when I tell you that I'm on a journey to be a gold digger, I'm only half-way talking about money and men. What I mean is: I am on a journey to SEE myself as valuable and SET my standards high enough that only quality partners and opportunities can meet them.

A black woman in a head wrap smiling at the camera.
Your Friendly Neighborhood Wannabe Gold-Digger

For the next few months, I'll document my journey and let you know how it goes. Make sure you've described to this blog so you don't miss a post. I'll also be vlogging about the experience on my YouTube channel.

I'd love to hear what you think. Send me an email to

Always true,

Dr. Tip

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